Thursday, April 24, 2003
 

Elvisette is cranky. Elvisette is tired of not being able to sleep. Elvisette is beginning to have trouble with basic thought operations. Attempting to compose term papers is another problem entirely.

Seriously. I can barely spell (more of a problem than usual). I can't even begin to count the number of times today that I've gotten up, walked a few steps, and realized that I have no idea why I'm standing up. I don't know if it's related to the tiredness or not, but my standing-up blackouts have gotten worse than usual, and I collapsed against the balcony doors yesterday morning (which was admittedly my own fault for getting out of bed too quickly). I've started to do things like debate whether I really need to wash my face and brush my teeth before I head for my nightly toss-n-turn session, because these tasks seem to consume excessive amounts of energy.

The doctor wants me to take sleeping pills, but I don't want to. Ambien was suggested, until I made it clear that I never sleep 7 to 8 hours per night anyway. Then Sonata came up, but I don't think that I'm a good canidate for that. I can't fall asleep, but I often can't stay asleep, either. I'm just resistant to the whole idea of sleep medication. I think that I take enough pills already, thankyouverymuch. And I'm afraid of sleeping pill addiction. The doc said that wouldn't be a problem, because I'd just taken them when I couldn't sleep. Well, that's sure been every single night as of late. And when I do sleep, I have horrible nightmares.

I went to Wild Oats yesterday morning but had to force myself because it seemed to take so much energy. The trip wore me out. At the moment, cooking anything, even boiling water, seems a bit extreme. Even pouring a bowl of cereal is tricky business.

Plus, two extremely idiotic pigeons are attempting to build a nest on my balcony. I've had to resort to swiping their tailfeathers with the broom. I'll be having none of that this spring. They trash the place and don't help out with the rent, and I don't appreciate it. So I'll play the psycho landlady role for awhile. I'm shockingly good at it, which perhaps means I should take this up as a career path. I could wear my bathrobe all day, never remove my trashy slippers. Hmm. The idea definitely appeals . . . Slumlord Elvisette. I like it.

Elvisette philosophized at 5:25 PM